The Phil Rumor Report: Phil to Become Sixth Backstreet Boy?

As the Backstreet Boys, teen icons of the late 1990s, attempt to make a comeback into cultural relevancy, it is apparent that they seem to want it Phil’s way.

“He is our fire, and, indeed, our one desire,” claimed Brian Littrell, when contacted by YOPNews.

As longtime Phil Phans will remember, Phil was devastated when not chosen by Justin Osborne, Ryan Harper, Ryan Steck, and Scott Dankel to assist them in the well-remembered Backstreet Boys “Mission Aid” skit at the BSU in 2000, a decision today’s rumor may cause some to regret.

“I can’t take any blame,” said Harper, who abandoned his own Backstreet Boy dream in favor of pursuing a doctoral degree from an Ivy League university. “In my opinion, Phil just wasn’t the singer we were looking for. However, clearly the professionals are correct in this matter. If true, I wish him well.”

Others, however, feel Phil’s heretofore unknown singing talents will serve the Boys well in their attempted comeback.

“I have sat next to Phil in church and heard firsthand the power of his voice,” said Crossing member Eli Marchbanks, who sang with the William Jewell College choir in his own college days. “It was nothing but a heartache for me. Phil’s phlexing of the golden pipes put me to shame.”

The Object of Our Affection remained humble, as always, promising to revive the Boys with not just the power of his shapely buttocks, but a steady stream of medieval historical comparisons sure to appeal to a more sophisticated audience.

Rumors also abound that the Boys are willing to change their group name to Philibusters, but those are unconfirmed as yet.